The War On Women

Thank Chance I'm a man. I'm so glad I'm a man. And I didn't have to announce to anyone that I was now a man, nor did I have to undergo surgical procedures or get hormone treatments to "become a man". (Somehow I survived circumcision and was still able to have a happy, pleasurable sex life, too.) Why am I glad to be a man? Because there's a war on women, of course. A war! It must suck to be a woman. According to what I see on Facebook, Twitter, and political news coverage, women live in deep, constant, crippling, fear every minute of their lives that a U.S. Senator or perhaps a Vice-President (or every other male who isn’t androgynous or feminine) is going to break into their home, rape them, and then force them to carry a life-threatening pregnancy to term and then they'll be punished with raising a child, even perhaps having to cook for it and clean up after it. And the only way to prevent this is through federal funding, programs, and requirements ensuring that women do not have to pay for their own contraception, and, if they get pregnant, using federal tax dollars to pay for abortion, including a ninth-month partial birth abortion. Should the child somehow be born alive, it is war on women to provide aid to that child to keep it alive. War, I tell you! Can't you see it???

Oh, sure, these people warring against women try to confuse everyone by claiming to be against sex-selective abortions that disproportionately target girls (who usually are women when they grow up), but that's just a smokescreen!

You have to hand it to the people who are waging this war on women. I mean, according to the marriage neutering advocates, there's no difference between men and women, so that they are these people able to perpetuate a war against women and not men indicates some scary talent.

But they're more nefarious than they are talented. For example, they would actually have people believe that some rape allegations are not true! Or that it's not rape if a woman initiates intercourse with a man and later has doubt about whether or not it was a good idea. Knuckle-draggers! We all know rape allegations are always true and always more important than everything else unless they are made against a pro-choice Democrat politician, especially with the name Bill Clinton.

Oh, and then they want to rape women with ultrasound wands to punish her for wanting to get an abortion. Don't believe them when they point out that an ultrasound provides good medical information or that a wand is the only way to do it at some points of a pregnancy. No, no wand should invade a woman's vagina right before surgical tools are inserted into the very same place to dismember the invasive parasite, unless that wand is battery-operated and being put there by the woman herself or by her wife.

Our defender, Obama and the Democratic Party, has made sure that employers and insurers have to spread the costs of medical services and insurance for women to men.

If those perpetrating the war against women had their way, women would be responsible for paying for some of the costs of the services they receive. Outrageous! If they had their way, women would have darn near almost as few choices as men when it comes to whether or not a pregnancy goes to term. In the name of equality, women must have many more choices than men!

The war against women can be seen everywhere:

• If a heterosexual couple gets into a fight, it is the man who gets taken into protective custody and may get set up with counseling, security, food, shelter, and health care in jail. Women can only stay in the home or go to a domestic violence shelter. Men aren't burdened with shelters. They get to go places like jail and their friend's couch.
• Men are much more likely to be getting all of that security, food, shelter, health care, recreation, and bonding time in prisons. Since men and women are not different, how dare men be favored in this way, while women are left to fend for themselves or to go apply for aid?
• Men don't have to be without the guiding presence of women, while women often have to go without men to do things for them. War-on-women lawyers prevent men from having to endure clubs and associations without women, but you don't see those lawyers stopping women-only places or events.
• Men, if they are white or perhaps of Asian ancestry, don't have to endure the indignity of having standards lowered for them to get them to participate.
• Men get to register for The Draft.
• Men are given a head start in the workforce, while women are forced to be the majority at universities and especially graduate programs.
• Men are more likely to get let go during recessions, thereby getting more free time.
• Men are more likely to get to die on the job, thereby experiencing excitement in their final moments.
• Men are less likely to get punished with custody of children, and more likely to have privilege of paying child support and alimony.
• Women have been used so as to make the workplace better, without any thanks. No longer do men have to put up with jokes or pictures of models that other men used to spread around the workplace. But those men haven't thanked women, because there's a war on women!

Imagine the horror of having to live with the consequences of your behavior and having to pay your own way through life. Can you imagine having to earn money, or marry someone who does, and having to save some of that money and perhaps use some of it to insure and invest? Isn't it terrifying that someone might have to pay for their own contraceptives, and might have to give some thought into whether, when, and with whom to have intercourse? Isn't it scary that someone might have to get private funding to pay for their abortion? Wouldn't it be tragic if mothers didn't have every cost and effort of raising their child handled and paid for by federal funds? Wouldn't it be appalling if employed women had to negotiate their own pay or designate a lawyer, agent, or union to do it for them, instead of having the federal government do it for them?

People like my wife need to wake up! They need to see that there's a war on women, and it is more important to worry about that than preserving American values such as e pluribus unum and liberty, more important than keeping the USA an international leader, more important than a crushing national debt, more important than having a federal budget, more important than slowing the unsustainable growth of government, more important than high unemployment and underemployment. Nothing matters more than having strangers pay for your abortion!